Eddie Izzard

[Caine]

Don't know how many of you like Eddie Izzard but this thread is for anyone who wants to quote any of his many humourous lines from him. Here's one to start you off...

"*bong* can i have a pillow please one of my breasts seems to have exploded, oh and can i have some more nibblies..." :LOL:

[withnail]

Oranges can fuck off!

[mental-masturbation]

Fine, I'll get a tray.........this one is wet, this one is wet, this one is wet, this one is wet, this one is wet........this one is wet - did you dry these in a rainforest?

[Gemsy]

Cake or death?

[Mort]

Cake or death?
We need to use that to anyone who calls Jaffa Cakes biscuits.

[Gemsy]

Hahaha! They are NOT biscuits. They're soft!

[Mort]

Hahaha! They are NOT biscuits. They're soft!
Exactly! Call them cakes or die!

[anomie]

and so the druids built stone henge... not wood henge, not straw henge, STONE henge! and no one knows what the fuck a henge is, but we've got one!

i love this man :D

(apologies if its wrong- did it off the top of me head :D )

[Caine]

Failed Guide Dog: Erm.... er... :confused: *looks at map* erm... *looks at blind mn* oh you're no help... :confused:

Hehe this is so much better when you see Eddie doing the mime along with it but still its so funny! :LOL:

[ladyfly]

*la sange est dans larbre*

(the monkey is in the tree)

[Letters To You]

Exactly! Call them cakes or die!
YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES YOUNG MAN (OR GIRL) CAKES OR DEATH!!!!!!!!!

[Caine]

*la sange est dans larbre*

(the monkey is in the tree)

No no no no, its la sange dans la branche ( the monkey is on the branch)
Also le chat est près de la chaise et la souris est sous la table
( the cat is near the chair and the mouse is under the table)

[Caine]

YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES YOUNG MAN (OR GIRL) CAKES OR DEATH!!!!!!!!!

But we've run out of cake, so your choice is OR death

[theimpressiveclergyman]

YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES YOUNG MAN (OR GIRL) CAKES OR DEATH!!!!!!!!!

BISCUITS, I SAY!! THEY COUNT AS BISCUITS!!

[mentalist]

dog - look you've dropped your stick... oh i'll go and get it... here... you've dropped it again! i'll go get it but stop dropping it!

[Nancuk]

"I always wondered about the novel 'of mice and men'- I mean how is there competetion. What can mice do? You can just see them going put the cheese in the back of the truck..drive away in T-2 minutes.."

[mental-masturbation]

No no no no, its la sange dans la branche ( the monkey is on the branch)
Also le chat est près de la chaise et la souris est sous la table
( the cat is near the chair and the mouse is under the table)
Actually, it's la sange est sur la branche

Because I am so sad....

C of E Priest: CAKE OR DEATH?!?

Man 1: Cake, please.

Priest: Very well. Give him cake!

Man 1: Thank you. Mmm, it's very nice.

Priest: YOU: CAKE OR DEATH?

Man 2: Er, cake, please.

Priest: Very well. He shall have cake too! We're gonna run out of cake at this rate........you! CAKE OR DEATH?

Man 3: Death, please. No, cake! Cake!

Priest: Ah, you said death first!

Man 3: No, I meant cake!

Priest: Ah, fine. You're just lucky we're Church of England. You: cake or death?

Man 4: Cake, please.

Priest: Well, we're out of cake! We only brought three pieces, and we didn't expect such a rush.

Man 4: What, so my choice is "...or death"? Well.......I'll have the chicken then.

Priest: Tastes of human, sir. Some wine? Thank you for flying Church of England - cake or death? Ah, Mr Hitler, yours is the vegetarian....you mass-murdering fuckhead.

:eek: Man, that took some time to write

[Britrock]

5 ran. Do they really need to put that at the end? 5 ran? What is it, 5 ran, 1 walked, 1 drove, 1 sauntered, 1 hang-glid. How do you conjugate hangglide anyway? I hang-glid, you hang-glidded, we hang-glidededededed...

Long time since I've seen the sketch, but that's the best I could remember. :LOL:

[withnail]

...blue underpants, you will infiltrate whites wash...

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

God: What you said what?
Jesus: I said take this it is my blood
God: Your blood? Your blood? They're all goin to be vampiric, your blood? Did you say anything else?
Jesus: Errrrrrr
God: ??
Jesus: I said take this bread it is my body
God: Your body? Now it's cannibalism?

(this is how i remember it lol :LOL: )

P.S. Izzard RULES! :D

[Mort]

BISCUITS, I SAY!! THEY COUNT AS BISCUITS!!
You die now! DIEEEEEEEEEE

[Drunk muser]

this guy rocks :LOL:

[Wibbly Wibby]

Yeah, bread FOR MY BREAD GUN!

"Ooh, thimbles," says man.

"Oh, if only thimbles had been invented," says psychic man with big hat and beard to match.

[mental-masturbation]

God: What you said what?
Jesus: I said take this it is my blood
God: Your blood? Your blood? They're all goin to be vampiric, your blood? Did you say anything else?
Jesus: Errrrrrr
God: ??
Jesus: I said take this bread it is my body
God: Your body? Now it's cannibalism?

(this is how i remember it lol :LOL: )

P.S. Izzard RULES! :D
:LOL: "Great, we're trying to kickstart this religion and you've got them believing in vampirism and cannibalism"


God: Holy Ghost, this is not an episode of Scooby Doo.
Holy Ghost: And I would have got away with it, too, were it not for those pesky God and Jesus fellas.

[Serpent_Sky]

"COVERED IN BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!"
I love that. :)

Oh, and,
"I am an evil giraffe, I will eat all the leaves on the tree, I will eat more leaves than I should... OTHER GIRRAFFES MAY DIE!"

:D

[theimpressiveclergyman]

You die now! DIEEEEEEEEEE

BUT IT'S TRUE, TRUE I SAY!!

[future]

Jam!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

No flag, no country. That's the rules I've just made up! :LOL:

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/events/images/promos/20030929-izzard-p.jpg

thought we'd all enjoy this on this thread lol
c y'all soon
((hugs))
Nikki

[Caine]

Me thinks someone is slightly obsessed with eddie...

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

Well, I would say slightly but my friends would say severely. After all I do know how many hairs he has on his left nipple :LOL:

[Caine]

*Ahem* i don't think many people want to know that, in fact i'm sure eddie doesn't know how many hairs are on his left nipple. :LOL:

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

Yes, but Eddie doesn't spy on himself in the shower. (i'm only jokin for all the people who r stupid enuff 2 take me seriously)

[Caine]

Eeeewwww i'm going to tell eddie on you... :p

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

NO! He'll get another restraining order and the last one just ran out! :LOL:

[Caine]

I think he should renew it for a permanent one... or until you find someone else to obsess over :D

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

well, I already obsess over derek (guy in signature) way more than eddie cos i no a lot more about Derek (such as his inside leg and wot he ate for breakfast several months ago)

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

And btw Andy (aka Caine) people on here should already know I'm wierd, if I've posted once they can usually tell straight away that I'm nuts!

[Caine]

You really should at least try to be more discreet with your weirdness.

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

I thought this would be the 1 place i wouldn't have 2 b discreet about my wierdness

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

And by the way "whose pig is this?" just 2 keep the thread as is should b! :LOL:

[Caine]

Thankyou, "God: I want an ark with a big room for poo" :LOL:

[future_queen_of_Rwanda]

That's the dogs bollocks your majesty!

[Nancuk]

I think this one os my favorite of all time

Everyone fucking lies! When we're kids, we lie our heads off! "I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I was dead at the time! I was on the moon...with Steve." And your dad's going, "I haven't even accused you of anything yet!" "Well then what is it? What is it? What? What?" "Did you brush your teeth?" "No! Yes! What's the correct answer? I was dead at the time!" Then when you're more mature, you do start telling the truth, in odd situations. "I'm sorry, I've broken a glass. I've broken this...is that expensive? I broke it...I'll pay for that." And you do that so that people in the room might go, "What a strong personality that person has. I like to have sex with people who have strong personalities." "And I've broke other things! I've smashed that...and that's gone...and I've just thrown the cat out the window."

[Caine]

*Loud Noise of bad church singing*
God: Jesus Christ what on earth is that?!?
Jesus: Don't take my name in vain dad!
God: oh alright, Jesy Chreesy what on earth is that?!?

:LOL: :LOL: :LOL:

[Black Mamba]

*la sange est dans larbre*

(the monkey is in the tree)
le singe est dans l'arbre!!or was it meant to be funny!!?

[Caine]

It's something that eddie said in, i think, Dress to Kill one of his stand-up acts in america, well that's where it was filmed.

Alcatraz!!!!!!!!

[brainbored]

Actually, it's la sange est sur la branche



In the original sketch (on either 'dress to kill, or the older one at the ambassasodor or something with a similar name to that, he said, "les sange a la dans l'abre". But in a later one he said the one you mentioned.

[mental-masturbation]

No flag, no country. That's the rules I've just made up! :LOL:
....and I'm backing them up with this gun here. :LOL:

BLASPHEMY................BLASS FOR YOU...........

[Wibbly Wibby]

England, what's that behind your back?

It's just...India and a number of other small countries...

[mental-masturbation]

England, what's that behind your back?

It's just...India and a number of other small countries...
:LOL: Ooh, we need the Falkland Islands! For strategic sheep purposes.

[moocow]

you Get The Instructions And Throw Them Out The Wondow!!!!

[moocow]

Squirals Sometime Stop Eating There Nuts And Have That Look Of
“did I Leave The Gas On” On There Face.
Then They Go...no...no Im A Fucking Squiral! :lol:

Errr..we...er... Lost..half Our Tribe When ..they..er...fell Over Themselfs. :lol: :lol:

[mental-masturbation]

It's...............POPEMAN! With Altar Boy, nanananana, Altar Boy!

Altar Boy, put out those candles!

[moocow]

“Scrappy-doo......a Magnum”

"POW" *shoots dog*

[mental-masturbation]

This is long, but brilliant. One of my all-time favourite sketches actually.

Pavlov, he was an experimentalist. He did experiments with dogs:
Day 1: Rang bell - dog ate food.
Day 2: Rang bell - dog ate food.
Day 3: Rang bell - dog ate my leg.
We know that, right? You ring bells, dogs will eat food. But his cat experiments were never published....
Day 1: Rang bell - cat fucked off.
Day 2: Rang bell - cat said "There's a bell ringing"
Day 3: Rang bell - cat answered door.
Day 4: Went to ring bell, but cat had stolen batteries.
Day 5: Rang bell, but cat put his paw on bell so it only made a "Thunk, thunk, thunk" sound.
Day 6: Cat rang bell. I ate food.
:LOL:

[twovolumenovel]

I AM A PIG FROM HELL!

I've come to invade your space, oooh I've come to invade your space, I've come to invade your space oooh I've come to invade your space. Who'll it beeee??? Who'll I choose?

:LOL:

and

GRRRRRRR That's my name!

and

Are you...happywithyourwash?

Canyoutellmeareyouhappywithyourwash?

[Wibbly Wibby]

This is long, but brilliant. One of my all-time favourite sketches actually.

Pavlov, he was an experimentalist. He did experiments with dogs:
Day 1: Rang bell - dog ate food.
Day 2: Rang bell - dog ate food.
Day 3: Rang bell - dog ate my leg.
We know that, right? You ring bells, dogs will eat food. But his cat experiments were never published....
Day 1: Rang bell - cat fucked off.
Day 2: Rang bell - cat said "There's a bell ringing"
Day 3: Rang bell - cat answered door.
Day 4: Went to ring bell, but cat had stolen batteries.
Day 5: Rang bell, but cat put his paw on bell so it only made a "Thunk, thunk, thunk" sound.
Day 6: Cat rang bell. I ate food.
:LOL:

Verily. That is fucking great. I watched that yesterday, actually. Genius.

[Caine]

It's...............POPEMAN! With Altar Boy, nanananana, Altar Boy!

Altar Boy, put out those candles!

Altarboy: Watch out Popeman, badguys at ten o' clock... use your jesus discs!!!

[twovolumenovel]

Buy Mr Dog for the small yappy type dog, and maybe he'll shut the fuck up!

:LOL: :LOL: :LOL:

[mental-masturbation]

So - yeah.........

[londoner]

Hey, this thread was nearly dead.

I discovered Eddie Izzard's genius talent last month !

I did know his name, I suspected he was a stand-up comedian but I knew nothing about his routines. I'm 26, living in London, and he has been mainly active in the past 13 years in Britain and the whole world is crazy about him. How is it then I did not discover Eddie before?

Then, last month, in YouTube I watched one of his clips and I fell in love with his intelligent comedy. He is a great actor too, his faces, the body moves. There are well over 30 clips of his stand up routines in YouTube. I'm going to buy all his DVD's.

Who has seen him live? I'm a bit concerned because maybe his active era is gone. He is not properly touring at the moment because he is concentrating in serious acting in films/tv series. But I believe there is a rumour that he might well be in London's next production of Cabaret. I wish he could play Sally Bowles, not the MC. That would be brilliant. Now that he doesn't cross dress anymore it would be great to see him in Sally's outfit.

[Popey]

Hey, this thread was nearly dead.

I discovered Eddie Izzard's genius talent last month !

I did know his name, I suspected he was a stand-up comedian but I knew nothing about his routines. I'm 26, living in London, and he has been mainly active in the past 13 years in Britain and the whole world is crazy about him. How is it then I did not discover Eddie before?

Then, last month, in YouTube I watched one of his clips and I fell in love with his intelligent comedy. He is a great actor too, his faces, the body moves. There are well over 30 clips of his stand up routines in YouTube. I'm going to buy all his DVD's.

Who has seen him live? I'm a bit concerned because maybe his active era is gone. He is not properly touring at the moment because he is concentrating in serious acting in films/tv series. But I believe there is a rumours that he might well be in London's next production of Cabaret. I wish he could play Sally Bowles, not the MC.

I haven't seen him live unfortunatley, I'd love to. Have you got Dress to Kill on DVD. It's one of the best stand up dvds ever.

[destructiveaesthetic]

I wish he would stop doing random film cameos...if that's holding back another act, I say fuck hollywood Eddie! (although if he does proper roles like in Velvet Goldmine...that's another story)

I love his comedy, it's exactly what I joke about..and no one gets it save for a few friends. I have all of his routines...I only have 2 dvd's though, I need to see more of them...it's so much better. I also need to see him in the flesh...I was only consciously aware of one visit but I couldn't go rar.

[Popey]

I wish he would stop doing random film cameos...if that's holding back another act, I say fuck hollywood Eddie! (although if he does proper roles like in Velvet Goldmine...that's another story)

I love his comedy, it's exactly what I joke about..and no one gets it save for a few friends. I have all of his routines...I only have 2 dvd's though, I need to see more of them...it's so much better. I also need to see him in the flesh...I was only consciously aware of one visit but I couldn't go rar.

Thing is he's a film nut himself so he loves all the cameos haha. The oceans 12 one was just awful though.

[Tom]

NEARLY dead? Only for 2 years or so!

[londoner]

I'm really sad I missed him when he used to wear skirts, I mean, that does not affect his act, but he looks great. Anyway, what I really, really, want to see is Eddie live, no matter the looks.

I've been told Dress To Kill is the best DVD, but I'll buy all his routines. YouTube has got some good clips, thanks to them I discovered him and now I know I'll never stop being a big fan. He MUST be the best stand up comedian ever. I've been spoiled, I don't think there is anyone better than Eddie.

[Max]

I'm really sad I missed him when he used to wear skirts, I mean, that does not affect his act, but he looks great. Anyway, what I really, really, want to see is Eddie live, no matter the looks.

I've been told Dress To Kill is the best DVD, but I'll buy all his routines. YouTube has got some good clips, thanks to them I discovered him and now I know I'll never stop being a big fan. He MUST be the best stand up comedian ever. I've been spoiled, I don't think there is anyone better than Eddie.

I still prefer Bill Bailey any day. :yesey:

[londoner]

I still prefer Bill Bailey any day. :yesey:

I've seen his routines, I like him, but Eddie has got that extra chunk of gorgeous personality.

One day I saw Bill Bailey walking in Soho, with his hair floating in the air :D Made me laugh.

[Dramatic Hammer]

My dad is friends with his dad :p .

[brainbored]

No no no no, its la sange dans la branche ( the monkey is on the branch)
Also le chat est près de la chaise et la souris est sous la table
( the cat is near the chair and the mouse is under the table)
Its not, its 'la sange dans l'abre' in the more famous version. I think he did say that one in a less well known one, but the original and most well known is 'la sange la dans l'abre'. I know this because i have it written all over the cover of my french book from when i first heard it back in year 6 or something, haha.

[Ril]

Haven't seen him live either, but I've seen Dave Gorman, and he was the dogs. :happy:

[brainbored]

Its not, its 'la sange dans l'abre' in the more famous version. I think he did say that one in a less well known one, but the original and most well known is 'la sange la dans l'abre'. I know this because i have it written all over the cover of my french book from when i first heard it back in year 6 or something, haha.
Haha, i corrected the same person 2 years ago on the last page :rolleyes:.

[Emmy]

'I like my men how I like my coffee, in a plastic cup.'

'Moths'

Lawlz.

[destructiveaesthetic]

Discutez the genius that is the Izzard.

[seregon]

Ha ha cheers I wasn't brave enough to make a thread :LOL: I did do a search about a week ago and a comedian thread came up but he so deserves one of his own :p I wish I had discovered him sooner...

Well anyway lets start by sharing some Eddie gifs illustrating some of his great "mimes" as he calls them:

http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f209/thisgirlbelongstosaint/Eddie%20Izzard/2750290.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/stonehenge.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/hitlerwt0.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/ambitionve3.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/EIcoffee.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/heels.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/EIsurprise.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/haveyougotaflag.gifhttp://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/eddie2.gif

[Britrock]

Got all 6 DVDs for £20 at HMV a few months back. Definite Article is painfully hilarious.

Azerbaijan.

[jambo10]

Love his talk about Europe, (where all the history comes from):LOL:

saw him on the Sexie tour, maybe not hs best, but he is one of the tpo comedians in his generation.

[seregon]

I got em for £12 was well chuffed :D Yeah I'm stuck between Definate Article and Dress to Kill. I'd say first half of DA+second half of DTK= pure hilarity :LOL:

I wonder if he'll make a comeback I've only known about him for about a year now :erm:

[destructiveaesthetic]

Got all 6 DVDs for £20 at HMV a few months back. Definite Article is painfully hilarious.

Azerbaijan.
guh. I've heard them all but have only seen Dressed to Kill and Circle. Oh my god I MUST get them.

[seregon]

Yes you must!! Plus they are all on You Tube as well

[Popey]

Dress to Kill is the best stand up show, EVER. .

Without a doubt. Eddie Izzard is just everything comedy should be.

[Vesper]

Dress to Kill is the best stand up show, EVER. .

Without a doubt. Eddie Izzard is just everything comedy should be.

+1!!! I watch Dress to Kill all the time!

I also loved Glorious.

I'm actually wearing my "Cake or Death" T-shirt atm!!!:D

Ha ha cheers I wasn't brave enough to make a thread :LOL: I did do a search about a week ago and a comedian thread came up but he so deserves one of his own :p I wish I had discovered him sooner...

Well anyway lets start by sharing some Eddie gifs illustrating some of his great "mimes" as he calls them:

http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f209/thisgirlbelongstosaint/Eddie%20Izzard/2750290.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/stonehenge.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/hitlerwt0.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/ambitionve3.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/EIcoffee.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/heels.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/EIsurprise.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/haveyougotaflag.gif
http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t297/nettie079/Eddie%20Izzard/eddie2.gif

These are ace!!

[Popey]

+1!!! I watch Dress to Kill all the time!

I also loved Glorious.

I'm actually wearing my "Cake or Death" T-shirt atm!!!:D



These are ace!!

You have a cake or death t-shirt *jealous* haha

[Vesper]

You have a cake or death t-shirt *jealous* haha

:LOL: Yup, I HAD to have one, I ordered it from CafePress.

Here's (http://www.cafepress.com/buy/Eddie+Izzard/-/pv_design_prod/p_684328.72616499/pNo_72616499/id_14271994/fpt_/opt_/c_360/pg_1) what it looks like.

I really really want this (http://www.cafepress.com/buy/Eddie+Izzard/-/pv_design_details/pg_1/id_12835228/opt_/fpt_/c_360/)one! :LOL:

[seregon]

Cake or deeeeaaaatthhh!?

I kept saying that to my mum it was freaking her out :LOL: And I WANT that t-shirt! Do they have any others?

Edit: They do! They have loads! That evil herbivore one would have been perfect for me not so long ago but I've started eating meat again so maybe not so much now :LOL: I'm so tempted to buy one.. they ship from USA right?

[Gemsy]

<3 Jeff, the God of biscuits

[destructiveaesthetic]

pwroar nice one! way to give me an excuse to stay in all day...fuck researching!

[Vesper]

<3 Jeff, the God of biscuits

Simon! God of Hair doo's!:LOL:

[muse-queen]

awwww man eddie izzard is teh sex!! :happy:

such a legend xx

[ADAM]

I got the six pack from HMV for about £3 - only cuz i had student discount and vouchers! :D

Me and my mum love him - think he's brilliant!

So much in fact that we end up saying some of his lines without knowing it!

Eg.

We had a few friends round for dinner that we hadn't seen for a long time.

We did a big dinner and it was very posh.

Afterwards my mum went round asking if anyone wanted some cake that she had made...

by saying:

"cake or death?"

To which our guests looked quite worried!

"erm.....cake please?"

:LOL::LOL::LOL:

[jambo10]

Anyone ever been on his forum??

[seregon]

Anyone ever been on his forum??

I think I had a quick sneak peak on it the other day but didn't really look at the topics or anything.. why, is it any good?

[jambo10]

I think I had a quick sneak peak on it the other day but didn't really look at the topics or anything.. why, is it any good?

I was a regular and one of its early members when it first started years ago, and it was all very funny and surreal stuff getting banded about, along with serious smatterings thrown in, but it got more and more serious so i and other founding members left, i look on from time to time but dont recognise anyone anymore, tho my profile is still there and all, ive kept in contact with a couple of other members from that time too, and we were talking recently that one night the 3 of us are all going to go in and hijack a thread and totally confuse the crap out of everyone who will wonder where these old timers sprang from all of a sudden:LOL:

[seregon]

Just been watching a bit of Glorious I love his talk on hoovers, it cracks me up when he goes

"Hodder-da-da"
"Where exactly are you from?"
"I dunno I gots dees weird accent, I av nu ideeeaarr"

:LOL:

[jambo10]

*this country is ours now we`ve brought a flag*


:LOL:

[seregon]

"I like my women how I like my coffee...covered in BEEEEEEESSS!!!"

[jambo10]

"I like my women how I like my coffee...covered in BEEEEEEESSS!!!"

guns dont kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too if they have guns!!

if youve never seen an elephant ski, youve never been on acid

:LOL:

[seregon]

We could do this all night if we wanted :LOL:

[jambo10]

So in Europe, we had empires. Everyone had them - France and Spain and Britain and Turkey! The Ottoman Empire, full of furniture for some reason. And the Austro-Hungarian Empire, famous for fuck all! Yes, all they did was slowly collapse like a flan in a cupboard.

:LOL:

[seregon]

The French banana war! (or something like that :LOL: )

[jambo10]

Pol Pot killed one point seven million Cambodians, died under house
arrest, well done there. Stalin killed many millions, died in his bed, aged
seventy-two, well done indeed. And the reason we let them get away with it
is they killed their own people. And we're sort of fine with that. Hitler
killed people next door. Oh, stupid man. After a couple of years we won't
stand for that, will we?

:LOL:

[seregon]

Edward the confessor, what the fuck did he do!?

Sir, we've found that the-
Yep, that was me!

[Vesper]

Prince Phillip, he's a card! Has a habit of saying things like, "You're all bastards!", then, "Was that wrong? Oh, I'm sorry …"

[Vesper]

His name changed from Jerry Dorsey to Englbert Humperdink! I mean, I'd just like to be in the room when they were working that one through: "Zinglebert Bambledack! Yingeebert Dangleban! Zanglebert Dingleback! Winglebert Humptiback! Slut Bunwallah!" "What?" "All right, Kringlebert Fishtibuns! Steveibuns Buttrentrunden …" "No, Jerry Dorsey! I like–" "No, we can't … let's see, we have Zinglebert Bambledack, Dinglebert Wangledack, Slut Bunwallah, Klingibum Fistlbars, Dinglebert Zambeldack, uh … Jerry Dorsey, Englerbert Humptiback, Zinglebert Bambledack, Engelbert Humperdinck, Dinglebert Wingledank …" "No, no, go back one!"



:LOL: I love that one!

[moocow]

are you happy with your wash?

[trouble]

The man is HILARIOUS!

Dress to Kill is absolutely BRILLIANT. I also love the joke he does about the giraffe, and when he does the walk.
Everything he says is so true it hurts!

[trouble]

His name changed from Jerry Dorsey to Englbert Humperdink! I mean, I'd just like to be in the room when they were working that one through: "Zinglebert Bambledack! Yingeebert Dangleban! Zanglebert Dingleback! Winglebert Humptiback! Slut Bunwallah!" "What?" "All right, Kringlebert Fishtibuns! Steveibuns Buttrentrunden …" "No, Jerry Dorsey! I like–" "No, we can't … let's see, we have Zinglebert Bambledack, Dinglebert Wangledack, Slut Bunwallah, Klingibum Fistlbars, Dinglebert Zambeldack, uh … Jerry Dorsey, Englerbert Humptiback, Zinglebert Bambledack, Engelbert Humperdinck, Dinglebert Wingledank …" "No, no, go back one!"



:LOL: I love that one!

Possibly the funniest thing I have ever heard! :LOL:

[Lucifer Sam]

then after a while you realise you're punching a baboon

[trouble]

The whole 'Fucking Doughnut' thing...

[jambo10]

then after a while you realise you're punching a baboon

hooahoo hooahoo hooahoo

:LOL:

[Lucifer Sam]

that is AWESOME.

what, you mean like a hotdog?

ok i could go on quoting forever, so that'll do for now.

[seregon]

So the Big Bang, eh? Everyone stood right back

[Lucifer Sam]

Oh my me.

[jambo10]

The man is HILARIOUS!

Dress to Kill is absolutely BRILLIANT. I also love the joke he does about the giraffe, and when he does the walk.
Everything he says is so true it hurts!

I am an evil giraffe, and I shall eat more leaves from this tree then prehaps I should, so that other giraffes may die

:LOL:

[Vesper]

The whole 'Fucking Doughnut' thing...

:LOL:

"Ich bin ein berliner!"

He's just said he's a doughnut!?

He's american its slang! "he's a doughnut! He's a Fuckin' Doughnut!"

too awesome.


the pope talking to Henry VIII

"What are you mormon?! you can't to all this! What've you been reading? The Gospel according to St. Bastard!?

[seregon]

:LOL:
the pope talking to Henry VIII

"What are you mormon?! you can't to all this! What've you been reading? The Gospel according to St. Bastard!?

I love the accent he puts on :LOL:

"So Sean Connery played the part of Noah.. 'No, I think we should build a shpeed boat you know? It'll make great photos for the bible with all the wind in our hair and for animals with long ears"

[Vesper]

I love the accent he puts on :LOL:

"So Sean Connery played the part of Noah.. 'No, I think we should build a shpeed boat you know? It'll make great photos for the bible with all the wind in our hair and for animals with long ears"

:LOL: :LOL: I love his Sean Connery voice! But I love James Mason as God even more!!

"Jesus Christ..!"

"...Dont take my name in vain Dad!!"

"sorry, Jeezie Chreezie!!"

"DONT call me Jeezie Chreezie Dad!"

:LOL:

[seregon]

Mrs Badcrumble! :LOL:

"Come on God, get out of bed you're missing the best part of the day!"
"Well I can't mother because I haven't yet invented the best part of the day, ahhh! Can't get me, box clever you see!"
"Oh, you young scallywag!"

[Vesper]

Mrs Badcrumble! :LOL:

"Come on God, get out of bed you're missing the best part of the day!"
"Well I can't mother because I haven't yet invented the best part of the day, ahhh! Can't get me, box clever you see!"
"Oh, you young scallywag!"

lmao!:LOL:


" Bum bum bum bum,I'm the Queen! I'll live forever! I'll never die! I'll live to a million!"

[Lucifer Sam]

Oh you survived, well done!

Uh, care for a top up?

[ADAM]

"dont go daddy...dont go..."

"ill bring you back a nazi"

:LOL:

"its my duty as a cockney bloke"

[seregon]

"dont go daddy...dont go..."

"ill bring you back a nazi"


..with real hair :D

[moocow]

"dont go daddy...dont go..."

"ill bring you back a nazi"

:LOL:

"its my duty as a cockney bloke"

"Rat ter tat tat and all throws terrible noises"

[moocow]

give me the start of any punch line or ramble from any show.. i'll finish it for you. i challenge you.

[seregon]

give me the start of any punch line or ramble from any show.. i'll finish it for you. i challenge you.

Did I leave the gas on!?

[destructiveaesthetic]

seriously one of my favourite faces he makes

[seregon]

Heh I leant my flatmate Dress to Kill I could hear her laughing all the way down the other end of the corridor, ace :LOL:

[moocow]

Did I leave the gas on!?

no I'm a fuckin' squirrel

[seregon]

"Don't talk to me that way! You fuck my wife!? You fuck my wife, you fuck my wife!?!?"

[Vesper]

"Don't talk to me that way! You fuck my wife!? You fuck my wife, you fuck my wife!?!?"


"I AM your wife!"

:LOL:

[Ellie.B]

He's on Johnny Ross on Friday :cool:

[seregon]

He's on Johnny Ross on Friday :cool:

You're joking!? :eek: :eek: :eek:

Does that mean hes making a comeback!?!?

[Vesper]

You're joking!? :eek: :eek: :eek:

Does that mean hes making a comeback!?!?

I sure hope so!

At the moment he's on a show here in the US called The Riches, its actually quite good, but he plays an American. I hope he goes back to doing Stand up!

[seregon]

Yeah Jonathan just announced it!!! Omg if he does more stand up I will be over the moon, no jupiter, the sun, the paliiiddeeesss!!!

I'm excited now :LOL:

[moocow]

"Don't talk to me that way! You fuck my wife!? You fuck my wife, you fuck my wife!?!?"

"I am your WIFE!"
"You fuck my wife!"
"Alright. o.k! .o.k! I fucked your wife!! I am your wife and i fucked her!!"

[Vesper]

:LOL: watched dress to kill before bed last night.

"Oh...I..erm...oh..."
"What is it sebastian? I'm arranging Matches..."
"Oh...I...uh...I think I better go.."
"yes, I think you better..."


But we play bad guys in Hollywood movies, like, take, uh, The Empire Strikes Back from the Star Wars trilogy. The Death Star – just full of British actors opening doors and going:
"Oh, I'm … oh … oh."
"What is it, Lieutenant Sebastian?"
"It's just the rebels, sir. They're here." "
My God, man! Do they want tea?"
"No, I think they're after something more than that, sir. I don't know what it is, but they've brought a flag."
"Damn! That's dashed cunning of them! Ah, Lord Vader!"



:LOL:
English Darth Vader gets me every time

'Ello! Look, I'm Lord Vader, and just pay a-bloody-ttention, all right? Luke, Luke, the force is strong with you."
"Is it?"
"Yeah."
"Well, who told you that?"
"Uh, s-some bloke. Yeah, he said the force is really rather strong with you."
"Well, how strong?"
"Uh, as strong as a small pony."
"Oh, that's quite strong, that is."

[seregon]

:LOL:
English Darth Vader gets me every time

'Ello! Look, I'm Lord Vader, and just pay a-bloody-ttention, all right? Luke, Luke, the force is strong with you."
"Is it?"
"Yeah."
"Well, who told you that?"
"Uh, s-some bloke. Yeah, he said the force is really rather strong with you."
"Well, how strong?"
"Uh, as strong as a small pony."
"Oh, that's quite strong, that is."

I love that :LOL:

Surely they must have a canteen on the Death Star?

"Penne Arabiatta please"
"You'll need a tray"
"No, I do not need a tray, I am Darth Vader I can kill you with a single thought!"
"You'll still need a tray"

[moocow]

hard one...

"blue pants you will infiltrate whites wash. you will be disguised as a......"

???

[Lucifer Sam]

"Oh...I..erm...oh..."
"What is it sebastian? I'm arranging Matches..."
"Oh...I...uh...I think I better go.."
"yes, I think you better..."



That's got to be one of my favourite all time parts :LOL:

[Lucifer Sam]

Building a henge are we? That's a fantastic idea. It's a marvellous religion the droids have got isn't it?

[seregon]

Building a henge are we? That's a fantastic idea. It's a marvellous religion the droids have got isn't it?

"Stonehenge! Ones of the biggest henges in the world! Nobody has built a henge like that since. Nobody knows what the fuck a henge is. Before Stonehenge there was woodhenge and strawhenge. Then a big bad wolf came and blew them down and relocated three little piggies to their projects"

I love that bit :LOL:

Sorry moocow not sure about the rest of your sentance :(

[moocow]

"i wanna live til i die.....???"

[Beast Love]

I've only watched clips on youtube, but he does seem really really funny

"I am not head of catering, I am Vader. I can kill catering with a thought"
"What?"
"I can kill you all...I can kill...me...with...a thought"


haha

"I am not Geoff Vader, I am Darth Vader."

[seregon]

"i wanna live til i die.....???"

damn I know thats from the beginning of glorious but its totally escaped my mind :LOL:

[moocow]

damn I know thats from the beginning of glorious but its totally escaped my mind :LOL:

'no more no less".. hehe good enough. "there noone here at the fire station" "iv'e lost my comedy" "leave me a fuckin' lone!!"

[seregon]

'no more no less".. hehe good enough. "there noone here at the fire station" "iv'e lost my comedy" "leave me a fuckin' lone!!"

"I wanna prostitute myself.. in a good way, not in a tacky way"
"So I gotta say I was born in France? Alright, alright, I was in there"

[Vesper]

damn I know thats from the beginning of glorious but its totally escaped my mind :LOL:

'no more no less".. hehe good enough. "there noone here at the fire station" "iv'e lost my comedy" "leave me a fuckin' lone!!"

"I wanna prostitute myself.. in a good way, not in a tacky way"
"So I gotta say I was born in France? Alright, alright, I was in there"

:LOL: I love that bit at the begining of Glorious! SO funny!

"Danger could be my middle name....but it's John.."

:LOL:

[seregon]

Have you seen the actual film? I love how every few minutes he goes "I got my head stuck in there when I was a kid" :LOL:

[moocow]

Have you seen the actual film? I love how every few minutes he goes "I got my head stuck in there when I was a kid" :LOL:

19 o'clock, 20 o'clock, 21 o'clock, 22 o'clock, 23 o'clock

[Vesper]

Have you seen the actual film? I love how every few minutes he goes "I got my head stuck in there when I was a kid" :LOL:
I have not!:stunned:

But I must!!

[Ellie.B]

You're joking!? :eek: :eek: :eek:

Does that mean hes making a comeback!?!?

Dunno :erm: But I'm seeing the recording so will tell all if he says anything comeback related :p Isn't he trying to break into serious films? :erm:

[seregon]

Dunno :erm: But I'm seeing the recording so will tell all if he says anything comeback related :p Isn't he trying to break into serious films? :erm:

Well he has done a bit of acting, I know hes in Ocean's 13 which comes out soon but he hasn't done stand up for a while now.. I really hope he does :stunned: I will miss Jonathan Ross this Friday but I will try (no WILL) and stay up and watch the repeat at 1.15am Sunday morning

[moocow]

i watched "all the queens men" two nights ago. it was better then i expected. he did well. he was plying a transvestite tho. it was funny hehe he did a long gay kiss,

[seregon]

it was funny hehe he did a long gay kiss,

Ok I am so watching that! :eek:

[moocow]

Ok I am so watching that! :eek:

it wasn't to graphic.. but it was unexpected

[destructiveaesthetic]

Did anyone watch Jonathan Ross last night?! I tuned in right after he went off...and ruddy Andrew Lloyd Webber was on chatting about who the fuck cares what...:(

[seregon]

Did anyone watch Jonathan Ross last night?! I tuned in right after he went off...and ruddy Andrew Lloyd Webber was on chatting about who the fuck cares what...:(

It repeats tonight at 1.35am if you want to stay up that late lol

[destructiveaesthetic]

meh can't, don't have a tv...twas just at my boyfriend's last night. should be on youtube eventually anyway.

[destructiveaesthetic]

blas-for-me, blas-for-you, blas-for-everybody-in-the-room
<3

http://www.geoffparfitt.supanet.com/new.gif.jpg

[seregon]

blas-for-me, blas-for-you, blas-for-everybody-in-the-room
<3

http://www.geoffparfitt.supanet.com/new.gif.jpg

I love that bit! It actually proper made me laugh!! :LOL:

And that pic whoo :happy: I want this shit film to end NOW!!!! He'll be on in a tic :happy:

[destructiveaesthetic]

What did he have to say??

hey, he's gonna be in this film that's centered around Beatles music called Across the Universe, he plays Mr. Kite and the site has a trailer, it looks alright heh...Beatles and Izzard...whatever man, I'm there!

[seregon]

He mostly talked about life in America, his new show the Riches and Oceans 13. Not much talk about his stand up :( Plus the other guests were kind of stealing the lime light that actress was fucking annoying :indiff:

[destructiveaesthetic]

that's Janice Dickinson....miss "I WAS THE WORLDS FIRST SUPERMODEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" she has a reality show over in the states and I caught some when I was home, someone gave her her own modelling agency and all she does is scream at them to lose weight and...yeah she's a bitch. she also judged on Top Model for a bit and she was way too loud...argh.

anyways aww :( don't live in the states, LA will suck you in and you won't be funny anymore.

need more pics:
http://www.marilyn.nu/ArticlePages/200507/01/20050701144618_Administrators319/eddie_izzard.jpghttp://www.nndb.com/people/032/000023960/eddie1.JPG

[trouble]

God save the Queen?

That is one saved fucking Queen!

It should be:

God attack the Queen...
Send bigs dogs after her, that bite her bum
Let them chase after her, and rip her knickers off!

:LOL::LOL:

[Vesper]

God save the Queen?

That is one saved fucking Queen!

It should be:

God attack the Queen...
Send bigs dogs after her, that bite her bum
Let them chase after her, and rip her knickers off!

:LOL::LOL:

:LOL:

The English never win at the olympics...because we've chosen not too! Because we hate our national anthem!.....because its God Save The Queen!

[seregon]

The American National Anthem is a bit hazy in the middle...

"A fish in the sky and a big monkey pie" :LOL:

[Vesper]

The American National Anthem is a bit hazy in the middle...

"A fish in the sky and a big monkey pie" :LOL:
I actually accidentaly sang that once!!!!!!:LOL:


"Just keep confirming and denying!!! They'll love it!"

[seregon]

I actually accidentaly sang that once!!!!!!:LOL:


It was in my head all day once :LOL:

[trouble]

I actually accidentaly sang that once!!!!!!:LOL:


"Just keep confirming and denying!!! They'll love it!"

I love that bit! :LOL:

[Vesper]

I love that bit! :LOL:

Haha, yeah that bit is great.

"It'll be a new religion...the psycitic bastard religion! and then an adviser said Well why not call it Church of England sir...Oh yes...Church of England is a much better name...even though I am Scottish myself..."

hahah i love his Sean Connery voice!

[trouble]

Haha, yeah that bit is great.

"It'll be a new religion...the psycitic bastard religion! and then an adviser said Well why not call it Church of England sir...Oh yes...Church of England is a much better name...even though I am Scottish myself..."

hahah i love his Sean Connery voice!

:LOL::LOL:

[Vesper]

:LOL::LOL:
:LOL:

"When I was a kid in school, the career advisor came to see us and said, "Look, I advise you to get a career, what can I say?" And he took me aside and he said, "What d'ya wanna do, kid? What do you wanna do with your life? Tell me your dreams!" So I said, "I wanna be an astronaut! And go into outer space and discover things that no one's ever discovered before!" He said, "Look, you're British, so scale it down a bit." "All right, then I wanna work in a shoestore! And discover shoes that no-one's ever discovered! Right at the back of the shop on the left …" He said, "Look, you're British, so scale it down a bit!" "All right, then I wanna work in a sewer. And discover sewage that no-one's ever discovered before. I'll pile it on my head, then come to the surface and sell myself to an art gallery." He said, "What the fuck have you been smoking, eh? "

:LOL:

[moocow]

:LOL:

"When I was a kid in school, the career advisor came to see us and said, "Look, I advise you to get a career, what can I say?" And he took me aside and he said, "What d'ya wanna do, kid? What do you wanna do with your life? Tell me your dreams!" So I said, "I wanna be an astronaut! And go into outer space and discover things that no one's ever discovered before!" He said, "Look, you're British, so scale it down a bit." "All right, then I wanna work in a shoestore! And discover shoes that no-one's ever discovered! Right at the back of the shop on the left …" He said, "Look, you're British, so scale it down a bit!" "All right, then I wanna work in a sewer. And discover sewage that no-one's ever discovered before. I'll pile it on my head, then come to the surface and sell myself to an art gallery." He said, "What the fuck have you been smoking, eh? "

:LOL:

certainly not in a bar in California thats for sure.....
Cos ya Can't!!!
yea, no smoking in bars.. and soon no drinking and no talking!
you better watch out California.. you used to be the crazy state.
Now people will be going, "come down the librarrywe'll have a wild time"
i dunno where tat fucking book is mate!

[seregon]

Wahahaha I love Dress to Kill :LOL::LOL::LOL::LOL:

I'm gonna order the Cake or Death t-shirt soon :D

[trouble]

Wahahaha I love Dress to Kill :LOL::LOL::LOL::LOL:

I'm gonna order the Cake or Death t-shirt soon :D

I want 'Jeff, the God of biscuits' on a tshirt

[seregon]

I want 'Jeff, the God of biscuits' on a tshirt

Yeah I've seen that :D I would also like the "Je suis un catastrophe" one :LOL:

[trouble]

Yeah I've seen that :D I would also like the "Je suis un catastrophe" one :LOL:

Or I'd like "He's a fuckin' doughnut!"

[Vesper]

I want 'Jeff, the God of biscuits' on a tshirt
:LOL:

I'm hoping to get the "I was on the Moon with Steve" shirt:LOL:

[seregon]

Or I'd like "He's a fuckin' doughnut!"

"Good job he didn't do a tour of Germany, 'I'm a Frankfurter, a Hamburger and a Doughnut'" :LOL:

[trouble]

"Good job he didn't do a tour of Germany, 'I'm a Frankfurter, a Hamburger and a Doughnut'" :LOL:

:LOL::LOL:

I'm going to have to go watch Dress to Kill now. It's so good!

[Vesper]

*bumps*

k6C_HjWr3Nk

[seregon]

I watched Defintie Article today. I love his talk on queue strategies its all so true :LOL:

"Damn I lost aisle four!"
"You bastard! I left my aura there!"

:LOL:

[Lucifer Sam]

I am ze Swiss guard. I have ze scissors. You have a thread there, I have cut.

......


I can open a can of beans with this one....in a week.

[Lucifer Sam]

hmm what the fuck am I doing out here, I thought I was having a chicken lunch


<3 Glorious

[seregon]

Heee yay lets keep the Eddie thread alive! "Le singe est sur le branche" has suddenly made it very easy to slip into conversation now thanks to Eddie :LOL:

[muse-queen]

my uncle put all his DVDs onto one disc for me :happy:

[seregon]

Sv5iEK-IEzw

:LOL:

Theres some others: http://uk.youtube.com/user/Thorn2200

[destructiveaesthetic]

those are genius!!!

anyone going to see Across the Universe? looks a bit weird and I don't like the chick...but...Eddie...

also did anyone see the Riches? I intend on downloading it soonish

[ADAM]

i watched sexie last night

and although his attire was cool I thought there were lots of awkward bits where no one laughed during the first 30 mins.

However as it went on it got better which is good.

Still not as good as some of his earlier stuff, but good nonetheless

And i liked the backstage footage on that disc too! :D

[seregon]

Yeah I'm not that keen on Sexie its his worst one in my opinion

[trouble]

Circle and Sexie fail to make me laugh like his older stuff did.

Shame really...

[switchbl@d3]

Speaking of Izzard, has anyone been watching The Ritches on Virgin 1? That show is the shizzle!

[muse-queen]

Speaking of Izzard, has anyone been watching The Ritches on Virgin 1? That show is the shizzle!

No I havnt, I keep meaning to but never get round to it

Is it any good? xx

[switchbl@d3]

No I havnt, I keep meaning to but never get round to it

Is it any good? xx

Its really good stuff, his character is great!

Anyone who hasn't heard of it....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHMbhBdKjkE&feature=related

[paper tiger]

+1!!! I watch Dress to Kill all the time!

I also loved Glorious.

I'm actually wearing my "Cake or Death" T-shirt atm!!!:D



These are ace!!

:LOL::LOL: haha i love that part...i get into a giggle fit every time i see that part...

"You must have tea and cake with the vicar... or you die!" Tea and cake or death! Students with beards, "Tea and cake or death! Tea and cake or death! Little Red Cookbook! Little Red Cookbook!" Ca – you know, 'cause, "Cake or death?" That's a pretty easy question. Everyone, – anyone could answer that. "Cake or death?" "Uhh, cake please." "Very well! Give him cake!" "Oh, thanks very much. It's very nice!" [points] "You! Cake or death?" "Uh, cake for me, too, please!" "Very well! Give him cake, too! We're gonna run out of cake at this rate. [points] You! Cake or death?" "Uh, death, please. No, cake! Cake! Cake, sorry. …" "You said death first, ahaaa, ahaaaa, death first!" "Well, I meant cake!" "Oh, all right. You're lucky I'm Church of England! Cake or death?" "Uh, cake please." "Well, we're out of cake! We only had three bits and we didn't expect such a rush! So what do you want?" "What, so my choice is 'or death?' Well, then I'll have the chicken, please." "Tastes of human, sir. Would you like a white wine? There we go thank you very much. Thank you for flying Church of England, Cake or Death? Cake or Death? Ah, Mr. Hitler, here's the vegetarian plate for you..."

[moocow]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sv5iEK-IEzw

[seregon]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sv5iEK-IEzw

already posted it but still hilarious :p

[Elzapan]

He was just on Dave, whos line is it anyway? he looked well young:( cayoote

[hystericali]

I saw him onstage years ago on his 'Sexie' tour :happy:

[muse-queen]

PWOPERLOL
*thread revival*

fbOC0uoKYtU

[trouble]

PWOPERLOL
*thread revival*

fbOC0uoKYtU

You myspaced this didn't you :LOL:

I woke up feeling low, watched that, and really cheered up!

I might throw one of his DVDs on tomorrow whilst I tidy my room!!

[Evilduck]

Eddie's doing 6 gigs in London this week. I'm going on Friday, can't bloody wait!

[seregon]

Eddie's doing 6 gigs in London this week. I'm going on Friday, can't bloody wait!

*has panic attack*

The ticketing system is unavailable due to
routine maintenance.

* Please check back later to purchase tickets.


It says Sunday is sold out but the others aren't so why can't i buy a ticket? :'( Must.. get.. one!!!!! And it starts at 11.15 :confused:

[seregon]

Ok I know its four in the morning (I got woken up and felt like playing around on my ipod) but I just checked back on the site and another four dates in March have been added on top of the three dates that were also just added.. so now hes playing.. ten shows!? But still won't let me buy a ticket so I'm hoping later today they will be available! Must get one!

Edit: Nevermind I got a ticket for Friday too! :D Row F! ZOMFG eeeeeeeeee :D:D:D

[jambo10]

Just whn I thought Eddie had given up on the UK....fed up with email alerts saying hes playing LA..he comes to the UK...oh yeh...London though.....nowhere else...hes a booger so he is!!!

[Evilduck]

*has panic attack*


Haha I had a panic attack too as I had no money in my account. So I got on msn to my friend and sent her about 50 messages telling her how much she wanted to go, and when she wouldn't reply I ended up phoning her. Then she bought the tickets for us and I was nice and calm again :LOL:

[seregon]

its just the train im worried about the last one is 1.08 I may have to leave early :erm:

[destructiveaesthetic]

oh my god that is so fucking awesome...I'm seeing him in 3 days!

p.s. fucking hate hate haaaattteeee ticketmaster it gave me the hardest time.

[seregon]

oh my god that is so fucking awesome...I'm seeing him in 3 days!

p.s. fucking hate hate haaaattteeee ticketmaster it gave me the hardest time.

+1 :LOL: It changed things around like three times!!! I just hope I can get back home ok my mum gave me a bit of grief about it :( The last tube is 25 to one if not its a bus

[destructiveaesthetic]

*damns ticketmaster to hell and back*

anyways i'm tempted to go to a march date as well...although it's gonna be the exact same show isn't it...?

[muse-queen]

is there still tickets available?

[seregon]

is there still tickets available?

Only for tomorrow and Wednesday..Friday is sold out :erm:

[muse-queen]

Only for tomorrow and Wednesday..Friday is sold out :erm:

argh
gutted

i was gunna buy tickets to cheer up my sis
but we cant make it

[seregon]

Oh wait I think there are some available for Friday: http://www.ticketmaster.co.uk/event/22004042A70C7FED?artistid=851852&majorcatid=10002&minorcatid=51

[muse-queen]

Oh wait I think there are some available for Friday: http://www.ticketmaster.co.uk/event/22004042A70C7FED?artistid=851852&majorcatid=10002&minorcatid=51

thank you
but i dont think shell be well enough to travel in time

cheers anyway
<3

[seregon]

thank you
but i dont think shell be well enough to travel in time

cheers anyway
<3

Yeah its way too late. I have a feeling I may have to leave early don't fancy getting a bus :erm:

[Spaced_out]

I wanna go in march, but it says that the event no longer exists/tickets aren't available on Ticketmaster. Are they actually happening?

http://www.ticketmaster.co.uk/event/2200403EA9DB6D9A?artistid=851852&majorcatid=10002&minorcatid=51

[destructiveaesthetic]

I don't know but man was it awesome last night. I was THIRD fucking row. and the theatre is sooooo small. Eddie didn't dress up or put any make up on and it was a bit loose at some bits but he's still got it!

For those wondering about trains...he went on by 11.30 but ended at 1. I don't know if that's enough time for you guys but the tubes are already closed by then. Hope you can make it!

[seregon]

I don't know but man was it awesome last night. I was THIRD fucking row. and the theatre is sooooo small. Eddie didn't dress up or put any make up on and it was a bit loose at some bits but he's still got it!

For those wondering about trains...he went on by 11.30 but ended at 1. I don't know if that's enough time for you guys but the tubes are already closed by then. Hope you can make it!

I'm 6th row lol.

And yeah I'm going to have to leave early :(

[Evilduck]

Ooh I'm very excited now :D Lucky my nightbus leaves from Leicester Square, so I won't have far to go.

[seregon]

Ooh I'm very excited now :D Lucky my nightbus leaves from Leicester Square, so I won't have far to go.

I could get a bus but I'm not confident with using buses in London.. I'm considering going early so I can check out where the bus stop is :LOL:

[trouble]

How was it?

[Evilduck]

It was bloody amazing. I didn't stop laughing from the minute he came onstage, brilliant :LOL:

[Elzapan]

FDKLAWEHF OAWE


:(:(:(:( i could have gone and seen him on ma bathday..

GUTTED.

[nataliej]

New Queue! New Queue!

[Clunge]

Cake or Death? (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/7261888.stm)

Only struck me yesterday how appropriately that fits :LOL:.



/not really a laughing matter...

[Elzapan]

Cake or Death? (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/7261888.stm)

Only struck me yesterday how appropriately that fits :LOL:.



/not really a laughing matter...

:LOL::LOL:




It's actually "Le sange est sur la branche" not L'abres as prev stated...

<3 T'izzard

[seregon]

Theres another thread? :eek:

*HAIL EDDIE*

[seregon]

New Queue! New Queue!

You bastard! I left my aurua there!

[Mausengeist]

...Do you have a flag?...

[Vesper]

We dont need a flag! Its our country, you bastards!

[seregon]

"What is it Lieutenant Sebastian?"
"Its the rebels sir... they're here"
"Dear God man! Do they want tea?"
"I think they're after than a bit more than that sir. I don't know what it is but they've bought a flag"

[Vesper]

"Damn, that's dash cunning of them! Ah, Lord Vader!" “Uh, hello."

[seregon]

"Damn, that's dash cunning of them! Ah, Lord Vader!" “Uh, hello."

:LOL:

"Luke the force is strong with you"
"Really? Who told you that?"
"Erm.. some bloke. Yeah he said the force is really rather strong with you"
"Well, how strong?"
"As strong as a small pony"
"ooh that's quite strong that is"

[Vesper]

:LOL:

"Luke the force is strong with you"
"Really? Who told you that?"
"Erm.. some bloke. Yeah he said the force is really rather strong with you"
"Well, how strong?"
"As strong as a small pony"
"ooh that's quite strong that is"

lmao I love that part


Steve McQueen plays the American guy who is dropped into British films in order to make them sell… in America, that is, because you’d go, “Oh, I’m not gonna see it, it’s full of British guys, and what the fuck do I know about British ...things?”

[MeredithOfZetaReticuli]

we just watched dress to kill the other day =)

the american national anthem i've noticed is a bit hazy in the middle. because you start strong and you finish strong, but the middle part's a bit "and a fish in the sky.. and a big monkey pie..."

[pr1nces5]

cats drilling behind sofas:happy:

this thread made me laugh, i love eddie:happy:

[destructiveaesthetic]

there's another in media :erm:

more visuals and videos!

[one_cell]

My favorite bit ever:

The Old Testament! The beginning of the world. That's where stuff began. In the Christian version of things. Everyone had big beards, big fuckoff beards. And the deep voice "Ohhh I say to you. The lions and the clouds and the chariots and the burning bush..Oh! Beard on fire shit! Into the Dead Sea. Ooo a goatee! Even the dogs, big beards, "Woof woof I say to you. A biscuit thank you!" In English comic books woof woof. In French comic books wuahh wuahh.

Haha that entire religion bit is so great. I don't have enough free time to type the whole thing though. Haha. Izzard is the greatest!

[Mkrat]

I am KING Pig from Hell, all pigs from hell get off at the next stop!

[Mkrat]

When he says "ive come to invade your space etc." he mentions somehting about a greek chorus, any idea what thats about?

[Cheesy Grin]

:D

He's just the best.

"Day one, rang bell. Cat fucked off."
"Day two, rang bell. Cat went and answered bell."
"Day three, rang bell. Cat said he'd already eaten!"
"Day four, went to ring bell, but cat had stolen batteries."
"Day five, went to ring bell with new batteries, but cat put his paw on bell so it only made "thunk" noise. Then cat ran his own bell! I ate food."

[Rasputin]

"Lost everyone. No one understands......."



.......and the shepherds were missing because the sheep were running amok.......they were late because they were trying to get the sheep to where Baby Jee was and there was a roadblock 'cos there were sheep in the road and they were trying to get them through and it was...............no one ever gets that bit. You know how sheep block roads and normally a car.........but if you're trying to get sheep through..........good comedy situation, I thought........but it requires this big, vast explanation............"what's he talking about?"

[seregon]

Eh? Are you talking about his new stand up?

[trouble]

The Big Bang... Everyone stood well back

[Luna.]

We're up to here with fucking castles. We just long for a bungalow or something *stares for a bit*

[Vesper]

I went shopping the other day and the kid who rang us up looked like Eddie but as a teenager! The resemblance was uncanny!!

"This woman's in for stealing HUB CAPS! Whaat a hellish crime!!"

[Cheesy Grin]

I went shopping the other day and the kid who rang us up looked like Eddie but as a teenager! The resemblance was uncanny!!

"This woman's in for stealing HUB CAPS! Whaat a hellish crime!!"

How tight can the chains be? Good God man.

[seregon]

I actually can't name what stand up that is from, but it definately isn't Definate Article, Glorious or Dress to Kill.